


Where Were You in the Morning

by alittlebitofurheart



Series: After Yale, Maybe? [1]
Category: Gilmore Girls
Genre: F/M, Fanfiction, gilmore girls after yale
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-10
Updated: 2020-06-10
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:21:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24650725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alittlebitofurheart/pseuds/alittlebitofurheart
Summary: Rory spent the entire summer focused on two things: her career after Yale, and life after Logan. So what happens when Logan is in New York City for the weekend? In her city for the weekend?(inspired by "Where Were You in the Morning" -Shawn Mendes)part 1/2**Please note that I do not own the rights to any of the Gilmore Girls' characters or have any affiliation.
Relationships: Rory Gilmore & Logan Huntzberger, Rory Gilmore/Logan Huntzberger
Series: After Yale, Maybe? [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1929727
Comments: 9
Kudos: 34





	Where Were You in the Morning

Staring up at the ceiling, Rory let her eyes adjust. She let her arm reach out across the bed, as she remembered the night before. But to her surprise, her bed was empty. "Did I dream that?" she questioned herself, as she sat up on her elbows to look around her studio apartment. She was alone. Except for the blankets and pillows a mess all over the bed and floor, it seemed everything was as it should be. Her apartment was full of sunshine, and the red numbers on her alarm clock read 7:43. Remembering it was Sunday, she knew there wasn't any reason to jump out of bed and rush to work. But she needed to hunt down her phone. 

Rory rolled over, sitting on the edge of the bed. She reached down to check the pockets of her pants for her phone. Empty. She looked on her nightstand, the floor. Rory stood up to shake out the sheets and blanket. Still no phone. She threw on a tshirt "is this mine?" and walked down the three stairs separating her bed from the living room. She walked over to where she spotted her phone on the kitchen counter. No missed texts or calls. Plugging the phone in and leaving it on the counter, Rory made her way back over to her bed. She picked up her scattered clothes as she went. 

After a hot shower, Rory made herself some coffee and checked her phone again. There was a notification this time. But it was just a calendar reminder for some ridiculous work event next week that she didn't even want to go to. "Damn you" Rory cussed out loud as she tossed her phone back onto the counter and walked back over to her fresh cup of coffee. She stood there for a minute, leaned against the counter trying to figure out how she got here. With each sip of coffee she took, she was more sure 'here' isn't somewhere she wanted to be. She put her empty cup in the sink, determined to forget where 'here' was.

Rory did laundry, she swept, she vacuumed, she did dishes, went and got some groceries, watched a movie. But as she put her clean sheets and blankets on her bed late that afternoon, she cussed out loud again. This time at herself. How could she be so stupid?

She spent the entire summer focused on two things: her career after Yale, and life after Logan. Rory managed to find a balance in healing and growing. And was (not) surprised to discover there was a whole plethora of people in her life that were absolutely okay pretending Logan no longer existed; including their mutual friends.

So when the girls called Rory earlier in the week and invited her out for drinks after work Friday, she never even hesitated to say yes. After work Wednesday, she went and bought a new dress. She had new shoes that deserved a new dress, and a night out with the girls was the perfect excuse. She worked late Thursday, to avoid the chance of having to stay late Friday. And when the girls rang her apartment at 8pm sharp Friday night, Rory was ready to let loose.

The music was loud, the drinks were fruity and smooth, and the company was exactly what she needed. They giggled on the dance floor, and reminisced while they rested their feet. When Rory came back to their table with another round of drinks, Juliet was whispering something to Rosemary but they pulled apart when they realized Rory had sat back down. After about 5 seconds of awkward glances, the girls looked at each and then turned to Rory and Juliet said "I know this is a vetoed topic, but you should know Logan contacted me this morning". 

Rory sat there, blankly staring between the two girls staring back at her. 'Play it cool Rory' She took a small sip of her drink, put the glass on the table and slowly nodded. "Oh yeah? Well, was that a courtesy explanation because it's not nice to whisper, or is there something else I should know?" Rory tried her hardest to remain calm, but she was forcing her now unconvincing smile.

Rosemary reached out and grabbed Rory's hand. "Hey, we're your friends first and we only want you happy Rory. We're sorry we had to say that to you." Rory gave her a small smile, this one a little more genuine. Juliet reached out and squeezed their hands and returned Rory's smile. "He's going to be in the city this weekend Rory."

Rory felt her whole body stiffen. She felt like dried cement, just sat there being rattled by the bass of the speakers. It had been over 4 months since her and Logan had seen each other, 3 since they'd been in the same city.

When she took this job, she had a moment of panic. Of course she had more of a chance running into Logan here than in Stars Hollow. But after being here most of the summer, she had convinced herself that if he was going to be on the east coast, he'd be in Hartford. Or at least not using her favorite coffee spot or her grocery store. But now, sitting here, being told he would be in New York City, her city, this was different.

"Has he been to the city this summer? I mean, you guys are telling me now, so you would have told me if he had been here any other time? Right?" "Yes Rory, of course we would have." Rosemary reassured her. "Well okay. It's a big city. And it's not mine. There's already so many people here, what difference would Logan being here make?" She picked up her drink, and this time took more than just a sip. Juliet and Rosemary followed suit and then looked at each other again.

"Guys, I'll be fine. It's not like I was planning on going out and painting the town this weekend." And as both girls were about to say something, Rory slightly lifted her hand to stop them. "No, I'm not going to be hunkered down and hiding. It's not a big deal. I'm not avoiding him if I had no plans to run into him."

Juliet and Rosemary weren't entirely convinced, and their faces showed it. But they all pretended that wasn't the case. "If you don't want us to see him, all you have to do is say so." "No, absolutely not! He's your friend, and quite frankly, he was your friend first. But if the whole gang gets together, can you remind Finn he still owes me breakfast?" Rosemary laughed, "yeah, join the club".

Kicking her heels off as soon as she walked into her apartment, Rory wasn't sure what made her more exhausted; Being awake since 6am and working all day followed by hours at the club, or knowing Logan would be in New York City for the next two days. Looking across her dark living room and seeing 1am on her clock only made her crave sleep more. 

After a very hot shower to scrub the day off, Rory grabbed her phone out of her bag to charge it for the night. When it lit up in her hand as she put it down on her night stand, she nearly dropped it when she saw the notification waiting for her. ‘Logan Huntzberger 2 New Messages’ 

In a daze, she put the phone on her nightstand and just stared at it. The screen wasn't on anymore, but it didn't matter. It was burned into her mind. She wasn't sure what she was waiting for it to do. Or what she was waiting for her body to do for her. Rory walked into her kitchen to get a glass of water. 

‘Logan Huntzberger 2 New Messages’ It was haunting her from the other room. She knew it wasn't just going to go away as if it never happened. That would be too easy. She put her glass in the sink, and walked over to stare at the phone some more.

‘I'm an adult, I can handle reading my own text messages' Rory picked up her phone, took a deep breath and opened them. There it was, two new texts in an otherwise empty chat from Logan Huntzberger.  
-I'm going to be in the city for the weekend. Didn't want it to be awkward if we ran into each other.  
-This is Logan.

Rory blurted "No shit you're Logan" as she dropped her phone onto her bed. Now she wishes she never opened the texts. What was she expecting? So much for being exhausted and ready to crawl into bed. She felt like she could run a marathon, or demolish her bedroom wall. She was fuming! "How dare he!" She stomped across the apartment and plopped down on her couch. "He knew. He knew what he was doing. That jerk!" Her phone dinged from the other room.

"Oh no he did not!" She got from her couch to her bed in record time. "He did!" And there it was, another text from Logan. "Does he have nothing else better to do than stare at his phone waiting for my reply?"  
-I know you read my texts Ace

This one stopped her in her tracks. It stopped all the air in her lungs. It stopped the earth from spinning. She felt her heart unravel. The last 4 months came completely undone. She felt like the city didn't even exist. She was sitting at Yale, and Logan was right there in the room with her. Looking at her in a way only Logan could. "No" Rory shook her head trying to get out of the trance. "I can't go through this again" And she wanted him to know that.  
-I know it's you Logan. And I'm aware of your plans to be in the city. Thank you for the warning though. 

She didn't even have time to put her phone down and walk away before he replied.  
-I'm hoping it won't be an inconvenience to you.

"Excuse you?" And now she was fuming again. This time she didn't want to give him the satisfaction and put her phone down on her nightstand. Rory made the walk around her apartment to get everything turned off for the night. "So damn rude" Every light switched was turned off as if it was her worst enemy. Her dirty clothes were thrown into her hamper like she was throwing her emotions into the trash. "Damn him"

After spending 6 hours in and out of sleep, cussing at Logan and at herself, Rory finally decided to get up and find something to waste her day with. She unplugged her phone and checked it before getting out of bed. No missed texts. Maybe he got the hint. She brought her phone into the kitchen with her so she could start the coffee.

After breakfast, her mom called on her way to the Inn. And Rory did her very best job to make sure Lorelai didn't get any hint of Huntzberger from her. She talked about the last couple days at work, her night out with the girls last night, and then very happily let her mom change the subject to some crazy thing Taylor was doing.

Around lunch time, Rory decided to go out for a walk to her favorite bookstore. She found it by accident less than a week after moving to the city, and all the workers knew her by name. And so they weren't surprised when she stayed for nearly two hours. She grabbed a coffee at her usual place on her way home. As she fumbled for her keys walking down the hall to her apartment, she nearly missed the flowers sitting on the doormat in front of her door. But she didn't. 

She unlocked her door, threw her keys back in her bag and picked up the flowers. She put her coffee, two new books, bag, and the flowers down on the kitchen counter. And then pulled out her phone. She opened her texts with Logan and sent -Stop

Rory was picking up the flowers to throw them out when her phone rang. And her heart sank. "No. I won't let him win. I'm better than that." And in her best chipper voice, Rory answered the phone and said hello. As Rory was about to say hello for a second time, Logan spoke up. "I wasn't expecting you to answer" "Then why did you call me Logan" That tone was a little less chipper.

"Look Rory I don't know what I di-" "No Logan, you aren't allowed to say that"

"That's not what I meant and you know it" "No, I don't know that"

There was a moment of silence. A silence that felt like an eternity to Rory. "Logan, if you had no reason to call then I'm going to hang up" And she meant it. She was beyond ready to hang up the phone. She was starting to rethink picking it up. She didn't know if she was angry or sad. And that only made her feel more angry and sad. "I want to see you Rory"

That caught her off guard. She was so confused and unsure about the whole situation, but she knew in that moment she never expected to hear that from the other end of the phone, from Logan. An almost silent "I can't" was all she could say back. All she could manage to say. And truthfully, she hated hearing the words come out of her mouth. And by the way Logan stuttered and struggled to answer, she knew he didn't like hearing it either.

"I understand. But I just- I needed to tell you. I'm here. I'm here in New York City and I just had to tell you." "Logan I know. I was out with Juliet and Rosemary last night and they let me know. Like I needed to make sure I was holed up in my apartment or something." That got a little breathful laugh from both of them. "I don't want you to feel like you have to lock yourself in your apartment Rory. I don't want to ever make you feel like you can't be out in your own city. That's never my intention." "Logan, I know it's not"

Rory stared at her feet, hoping the conversation would end. While also hoping it could continue forever. "I know this conversation isn't one you want to have, and I'm sorry for putting you through it. But I'm in the city until a red eye tomorrow night. So if you change your mind, change your mind at all, please call me. Or text me. Or just- could you let me know Rory. Even if you change your mind back could you just-" "Logan, I'll let you know" "Thank you Rory"

She could hear the smile in his voice.The way his voice carries through the phone when she makes him smile. That's a sound she doesn't think she'll ever forget. "Goodbye Logan" "Goodbye Rory"

Rory went into one of her lower kitchen cabinets, pulled out a vase, and filled it with water. Seemed silly to let such beautiful flowers to waste. She grabbed one of her new books and put the vase on her coffee table before sitting down on her couch to start the book.

Rory was almost done with her book when she realized her apartment was starting to get dark. She put her book down next to the vase, a smile crawling across her face. She got herself a glass of water and went about deciding what to make for dinner. It was a toss up between left over Chinese from Thursday night and the second half of her sub from lunch yesterday. Or, she really could just throw her shoes back on and go get something fresh. She stared at the takeout containers in her fridge for another minute before closing the door, putting on her shoes, and grabbing her things.

She made the walk 2 blocks to the same place her left over sub was from. She was about half way there when she decided to call her mom. Just as she was about to dial the phone, a face caught her attention. In a moment that felt like out of a movie, she locked eyes with Logan. He was standing about 10 feet in front of her on the sidewalk, and people rushed by them. They both just stood there, almost afraid to move.

Logan was the first to move. Rory felt an almost urge to take a step backward, as if he didn't notice her and wouldn't notice her trying to escape the inevitable. Apparently the look on her face gave away how she was feeling, because Logan slowly raised his hands above his waist as if to say stop. And in that moment, Rory calmed in a way she didn't know was possible. "Hi" was all he said. And all Rory could say back was "hi". 

They stood there, just looking at each other for a moment when Rory broke the silence. "I guess we shouldn't be standing in the middle of the sidewalk. We're not from the city, we know better" Logan chuckled and led her closer to the building they were standing in front of. "Decided to escape your weekend prison sentence?" "What? Oh" Rory awkwardly put her hair behind her ear, as if they've never talked like this before.

"Look, I can go if you don't want to have this conversation." "No, it's fine. I'm just on my way to grab dinner. And apparently bumping into the one person I was trying not to in a city full of millions of people." She smiled at him. And she watched the smile grow across his face, and felt his body move in the slightest towards her. "Do you want to walk with me? Wait, you were going the opposite way weren't you." "It's fine. I wasn't going anywhere important, I can change my direction of travel. But only because you asked." They stood there alone on that busy New York City street smiling like idiots at each other. 

"It's just this small deli. But so far, it's the only place I've found that feels like home here." "Then let's go" Logan extended his arm to guide her in the direction she was walking before they found each other.

Rory almost felt out of place walking with Logan. They were walking on crowded New York City sidewalks, and still managed to not touch. She was also certain walking this block was taking longer than it had ever taken her. They walked in silence, she didn’t look Logan’s way. It was like he wasn’t even there. But he was definitely there. Her nerves made sure she remembered that. As they neared the corner, she broke the silence, “it’s just around this corner”. As she looked at him, she knew he had already been looking at her.

Logan held the door open for her, and she blushed as she thanked him. Although she had left her apartment with the intention to grab her food and go, she asked Logan if he would sit with her. They ordered their food and went and sat down at a table they spotted in the corner. The silence with them continued as they ate, at least there was eye contact now. Awkward eye contact that made Rory want to scream and run away. 

She was staring off out of the window when Logan laughed a little. She assumed she had food on her face, so she frantically grabbed her napkin, afraid to look him in the eyes. As she brought the napkin to her face, Logan lightly grabbed her hand, “No Ace, you’re fine” laughing a little more. With her hand still hovering in the air, with his hand still on it, she felt the unsteady feelings leave her body. 

“Did I do something else that made you laugh then?” “It wasn’t you, it was me.” Rory just looked at him, and she knows her face gave away that she was confused. Logan just smiled, squeezed her hand a little, and then let go. She instantly missed his touch, more than she had in months. “Are you going to leave me hanging, or are you going to tell me what you found so funny?” Logan took a sip of his drink before he spoke. “This just feels so crazy to me, like it’s not actually happening.” That made Rory smile, because she felt that exact same way. “Oh, so I’m not alone” This time when Logan reached out for Rory’s hand, she was ready for it. They sat there for a moment, just smiling at each other. “I missed this” “I missed you Ace”

They finished eating, without much talking. Just smiling and watching each other. Learning to be around each other again. Logan held the door open for Rory again as they left, this time placing his hand gently on her lower back to guide her back onto the sidewalk. She slowed a little so that his hand became more firm on her back. He slowly slid his hand along her back so that it rested just at her side. She smiled at him as they rounded the corner, walking towards the spot they met just an hour earlier. 

When they got back in front of the storefront from earlier, which she now realized is a cafe she had never been to, she stopped and turned towards him. “So, is this where I leave you?” Logan faced her and smiled, “Only if you want to.” She smiled in return, grabbed the hand that was no longer on her back, and started walking towards her apartment. “Well it’s a good thing I bought you dinner first, Ace.” 

She unlocked her door, and hesitated for a second. “Rory if you are uncomfortable, I don’t have to come in.” “No, Logan it’s not that. 24 hours ago, you weren’t here. And I was here alone, in my quiet No Logan bubble. And then that bubble popped, and then you were texting my phone, which made me so mad and I was pacing all over my apartment. And then I was just minding my own business and convinced myself I shouldn’t eat the leftover take out I already had in my fridge so I left my apartment, and to be honest I look a mess and I only just realized. And then I ran into you which was bound to happen sooner or later. It’s New York City, it’s not Stars Hollow. And then we had a meal together, a whole meal Logan. And now we’re here standing at my front door. It’s not like you’ve never been into my home. Well not this home, but you aren’t a stranger. And now I’m rambling and freaking myself out for absolutely no reason.” 

Logan just watched her as she went on and on. Smiling the entire time. “I’ve missed you Ace.” She knew at that moment she wanted to kiss him. And so in true Rory fashion, she opened her door and walked away from him, leaving him standing on the mat her mom gave her the day she moved in, just staring at her. She put her purse on the counter and turned and looked at him. “Well, if you’re going to stand there, at least close the door.”

Logan took a step into the apartment, without looking away from her, reached to his side until his hand made contact with the door, moved slightly to his left and closed the door. The gesture reminded her of a night in her grandparents pool house. She smiled remembering running to her bedroom when he closed the door, him chasing after her. He smiled back at her. “Deja vu for you Ace?” She laughed as she ran across her living room and up the three steps to her bed. Before she could turn and see if he had followed, his arms were around her spinning her around. “Can’t close a door to slow me down here.” 

And she kissed him. Simple and fast. She needed the contact. Logan tightened his grip around her, pulling her closer to him and deepened the kiss. They both smiled into the kiss. Her hands reached for his face, as his traveled up her body. “Stay” And that’s all Logan needed to hear. He guided her backwards, onto her bed. 

They were laying together on her couch a few hours later, wrapped around each other, a blanket doing the bare minimum. The apartment was dark, not a single light was on. The only light was the city lights coming through the curtains. Rory was smiling against his chest, Logan’s fingers running through her hair. “And to think, 24 hours ago you were pacing your apartment angry with me.” Rory laughed, sitting up to look at him. “I never said I stopped being angry with you” and she stuck her tongue out. “Oh, is that right?” In one swift motion, Logan sat up, grabbing Rory, and flipped them over so he was looking down at her. 

Logan leaned down to kiss her. “You know I’m leaving in 20 hours.” “Don’t do that. You know I hate when you do that.” “But I have to Ace. This time I have to.” Rory reached up and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him down to her. “Please just be here now.” “I don’t want to be anywhere else.”

And now here she was, sitting in her apartment in the dark alone. The clock said 8:47. Which meant Logan’s red-eye as approaching, and still not a single thing from him. “Apparently not wanting to be anywhere else meant something different than I thought it did” Rory flopped over on the couch, not even bothering to check her phone sitting in the other room. She closed her eyes just wanting it all to go away.

A knock on her door woke her up. She had no idea what time it was, but she shuffled over to her door, checking through her peephole. What she saw on the other side of her door knocked her off her feet. She gasped and backed away from the door. There was a second knock. Rory collected herself, and opened the door. She was ready to yell and scream. But instead, she started crying. 

Logan almost didn’t catch her before she hit the floor. He held her, sitting there in her doorway, his bags sitting outside. “I can’t keep doing this Logan. I can’t keep hurting. You keep leaving.” “I’m not leaving, that’s why I’m here.”

Rory sat up, tears all over her face. “Ace, I ran this morning. And I hated doing it. All day I thought about walking away from you at Yale. Not trying, not being there for you, not understanding. I missed you. I missed us. I missed your move to New York, I missed your first day on the job. But saying goodbye scared me. I didn’t trust myself. I knew if I stayed here and waited to say goodbye, stayed the day with you, I would never leave. You’re so happy here. You did it Ace, you did this. And you did it without me. And I am so proud of you. But I can’t take that away from you. I can’t let you hope and wait for me while I’m on the west coast. You were very clear how you felt about that.” He choked up as he spoke.

Logan ran his hand across Rory’s cheek, wiping away tears as more fell. She saw that his own face had tears on them. “Rory I can’t go back home without you. Not that I want you to come back with me, though the thought of that makes me happy, but I know you won’t go. And I won’t ask. But I miss you Ace. I miss having you in my life. Through the phone, in my apartment, in my arms. I don’t care how, I just miss having you there.”

Rory continued to watch him as he spoke. Her feelings have never changed, she still felt the same way she did the day he walked away from her at graduation. She was firmly grounded in not moving for him, willing to try other options. And here he was, pouring his heart out respecting just that. But she was hurting, hurting more now than ever. And he needed to know that. “Logan, I won’t leave New York. You were right in saying I was clear in that decision. I’ve missed you by my side every day. My heart ached as my life changed without you. Moving, getting this job. A whole summer of changes, and you weren’t a part of any of it. I didn’t imagine my life to be like this.” She began crying again.

Logan held her for a little longer, neither saying anything. He kissed the side of her head. “Your door is still wide open, and my things are still in the hallway, but I don’t want to let you go.” She smiled, lifting herself away from him. He smiled back at her, wiping her cheek again. “Hi Ace” “Hi” He helped her up, and brought his bags inside, closing the door behind him. “Logan, what about your flight?” “I’ve already canceled that.”

“You didn’t know how I was going to react.” “It didn’t matter, I wasn’t going to leave like this.” She held her hand out, and he reached for it. She led him to the couch. He sat down, she sat next to him and laid her head down on his shoulder. “We can’t ignore this Logan, we need to actually talk about this this time. No walking away.” “No walking away.”


End file.
